Loving Yourself Through the Process
Scripture Focus: Psalm 139:14 – “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
Reflection:
Loving yourself through the process is something I’ve had to learn on my own journey—especially through seasons of change and healing. For so long, I believed I needed to be “fixed” before I could truly love myself, but God gently showed me that I am worthy of love right now. This truth became clearer as I worked on rebuilding my spiritual identity and rediscovering my purpose. It wasn’t the end result that mattered—it was the willingness to love and accept myself through the process.
Through the painful loss of my son and the changes in my life since then, I’ve come to understand that loving yourself is not about waiting for perfection. It’s about honoring who you are in the moment. It’s about acknowledging that even in the midst of grief, struggle, and uncertainty, I am still worthy of love.
Self-Love vs. Self-Centeredness: What’s the Difference?
For years, I struggled with the concept of self-love. I thought it was selfish, and I wrestled with guilt about taking care of my own needs. It wasn’t until I began understanding the difference between self-love and being self-centered that I realized it’s okay to love myself.
Self-love is about compassion. It’s about recognizing that I am fearfully and wonderfully made by God, and I deserve to show myself the same grace I offer others. Loving yourself is not about being perfect, but about caring for your emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being. It’s an act of honoring the process.
Self-centeredness, however, can come from a place of ego and insecurity. It looks like demanding attention or neglecting others because you feel you’re entitled to more. But true self-love empowers us to love others better, not less.
Loving Yourself When It’s Hard
Loving myself during difficult times hasn’t always been easy. I’ve found that the hardest moments—like when I walked away from God for a time or when my son passed away—taught me the most about the depth of God’s love and how important it is to show myself grace.
In those times, self-love didn’t look like perfection or being “okay” all the time. It looked like allowing myself to feel pain, taking time to heal, and being kind to myself on days I couldn’t muster the strength to do much else. It meant letting go of guilt and embracing God’s love for me, even when I couldn’t understand the fullness of my own journey.
Here are a few things that helped me love myself during the difficult seasons:
Grace in the grief: Loving myself meant letting myself grieve without shame. I gave myself permission to feel the depths of loss, knowing that healing would come in time.
Setting boundaries: After a period of spiritual wandering, I learned that setting boundaries was an act of self-love. It allowed me to protect my heart and make room for healing.
Scripture as a reminder of my worth: Psalm 51 became my prayer, reminding me that God is near even in my brokenness. I held onto the truth that He sees my heart, and He is not done with me yet.
Prayer:
“Lord, help me to embrace the process. When I feel unworthy or lost, remind me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made, even in my brokenness. Teach me how to love myself in a way that honors You and helps me heal. Give me the strength to continue loving myself through the ups and downs of my journey. Amen.”
Takeaway:
Loving yourself through the process doesn’t mean you’ve got it all figured out. It means accepting who you are in the present moment and knowing that God’s love for you is constant. Even in seasons of loss and uncertainty, you are worthy of love, grace, and healing.
